Random Ramblings- A Journal Entry

I traveled quite a bit this summer. From May to September I took 12 trips to various places around the country- to visit friends, attend weddings, and fulfill Alpha Gam roles. In August and September, I made 4 trips for Alpha Gam to visit chapters, establish a chapter and hopefully open a new chapter. I think I just wanted to get away from Eugene and so every opportunity that I had to get away, I did. Not that I didn't want to do all the things that I did. I love the time I spend on Alpha Gam. And, it wasn't that I wanted to get away from my husband. He is my rock. I was so frustrated in my job and with life in Eugene. I just wanted to get out and away from it all for a while.

My very last trip was to Walla Walla, Washington. Somewhere 30,000 feet above the Oregon/Washington border and farm land, I had the urge to write what all was rambling through my head. Looking back, I think it really is a reflection of my emotions at the time and helps me understand my decision making even if I couldn't at the time. I am about to really put myself out there and be very vulnerable. So....here goes.

"How I love to travel. No one can find me here. Call me. Email me. Text me. I can gaze out across the landscape. Rolling mountains, winding rivers, sun-kissed land. Quiet. Breathing.

Clearing my mind of the clutter that weighs it down. Insignificant clutter that clouds what is really important. How did I get so bogged down? Walked on and taken for granted. Always the volunteer, leader, or filling in the gap. This place just sucks you in like a black hole.

I wonder if the ants below feel the same way with all the farming, schooling, raising kids and crops.

And, why do I feel so angry? I think because it's out of my control most of the time. If I was in charge, I'd do this. Or that. Or if this would have been handled earlier. Oh, I drifted back to work. What is management versus leadership? What does that mean in a complex organization? Can I be a better leader? Can I make a change?

And back to that significant stuff. You know, my caring husband, amazing group of friends, and family anyone would die to have. How neglected do they feel? I put them last sometimes. I build off of their energy and love to go outwards. But at what cost? Thank God my husband gets me, knows me to my core.

How do I keep it under wraps, those feelings that I hide? Oh, look at that cute baby. I am so happy, yet so sad. I really want to have children. But how? Not now. Reward for finishing the degree? Ok. Sounds good. Now finish. Then you can follow the plan...baby by....oh wait. That's a bit more complicated. Will we be able to? What if we can't? I'm so old now. I sure hope. My heart depends on it. That bottled up desire to have a child."

New Adventure

I am so excited to share that John and I will be traveling to Pondicherry, India from December 28-January 12. John is establishing a new service learning trip for students that will take place next year. He and Dr. Dan Close from the College of Education at the UO are conducting the on site visit to move this project forward. And, as a result I am going to tag along!

Here is what I know so far:
This is where we will be going and spending most of our time. Pondicherry, India

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The organization that John is working with is the Sri Aurobindo Ashram. We will meet with people from the community so we can plan out the curriculum and logistics for the trip the students will take a year later. When the students are there they will engage in individual and group projects in village settings that will be directed to education, village development, environmental and facility development. The purpose of these projects in the service-learning setting is to teach students about partnerships, reciprocity, capacity building, sustainability, cross-cultural understanding and problem solving skills. Students learn about partnerships by building and maintaining relationships with local leadership, Indian students and other stakeholders who come together to advance these projects.

I am really excited to accompany John on this trip and to visit a country I had hoped to visit! More to come as things shape up. Any tips or recommendations for us? If so, leave a comment!

Rejuvinating the Blog...here we go!

Alright my friends, followers, and random readers. It's time for the blog to make a come back! I know, I know. It's been years...whoa, it hurts to say that! But I need to get back into the mode of writing and putting my ideas out into the world. It has been a wonderful year away from the blogosphere- I got married and have moved forward in my career. However, it's time to dig back in and get to the business of finishing my degree. Let's go my friends! Let's do this!